no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
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