This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Randomize
