If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
Randomize