Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
Randomize
