Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
Randomize
