you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
