i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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