Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
They should really pass out barf bags in church
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Randomize
