you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Randomize