They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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