Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
Randomize
