I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
honey bunches of taint.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
false alarm, still single
Randomize
