careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Randomize
