Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
