i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize
