Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
i drank out of a bidet.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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