Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Randomize
