my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
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