just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
