The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
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