It's just like the Real World with babies
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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