Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
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