you have to choose: penises or morals?
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize