I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
Randomize