Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize