on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Randomize
