let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize
