ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
