we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
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