Tell her she can't have a vagina
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize