I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Randomize
