shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
