NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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