dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Randomize
