i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
