a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize
