you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Randomize