I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize
