Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
