The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Randomize
