Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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