wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
smell my finger.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
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