dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize
