She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
