love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I think i peed on brittanys purse
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize