I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
did i just pee glitter
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
Randomize
