don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
