My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
Randomize
