Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
