I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Randomize
